Unashamed - Starfield

I have not much to offer You
Not near what You deserve
But still I come because Your cross has placed in me my worth

Oh, Christ my King Of sympathy whose wounds secure my peace
Your grace extends to call me friend
Your mercy sets me free

And I know I'm weak I know I'm unworthy to call upon Your name

But because of grace, because of Your mercy

I stand here unashamed

I can't explain this kind of love
I'm humbled and amazed that You'd come down from heavens heights
And greet me face to face

Here I am at Your feet
In my brokeness complete

At your feet.. Incomplete

Team~

As I mentioned in a couple posts, I had a music performance again :D and so excited about it.
I'm happy to join a team which has a good chemistry and a great dynamic. AWESOME!

Bang Ade, Me, Naomi, Frans, Kaleb

p.s: later I will upload our performance when I get the video :D

You raise me up

I will (really, really, really) miss you, guys!

Student #2

Okay, kali ini gua akan bercerita tentang murid gua berinisial B. Seorang laki-laki yang udah SMA. Pertama kali gua liat dia, orangnya agak aneh. Kepalanya nunduk kalau jalan dan punggungnya dibongkokkin sama dia.
Kalau lagi latihan dia juga jarang menatap mata gua. Kalau gak diinstruksiin dia juga ga bakal gerak. Awalnya agak bingung juga sih ngajarnya gemana karena otak gua udah berasumsi yang aneh-aneh. Ternyata setelah gua coba ngajar dia, orangnya memang sedikit lebih lambat mengerti daripada orang apda umumnya. Dia pernah mau berhenti main piano karena gak punya piano. Orangtuanya gua liat berusaha banget beliin dia piano. And finally he's got one.
Sulit untuk mendeskripsikan B lebih lanjut karena B sendiri orangnya sangat pendiam.
Mama nya pernah bilang sih kalau B anaknya pemalu banget. Gua pernah terkejut waktu tau ternyata dari rumahnya ke sekolah musik itu mengendarai motor sendiri. Tadinya gua kira dia anak yang di-protect banget sama ortunya.
Gua salut sih sama B dan keluarganya karena gua merasa keduabelah pihak itu pantang menyerah.
Untuk B gua sarankan lebih belajar ketukan. Misalnya gak ada metronome coba clapping dengan ngikutin arah detik jarum jam. Terus B belum hafal tuh do = C, re = D, mi = E, fa = F, sol = G, la = A, si = B.
Penjarian B juga masih belum bagus. Semoga B semakin rajin berlatih jadi setidaknya bisa memperbaiki posisi jari dulu. Semangat yaa B.

Because of you by Kelly Clarkson

I will not make the same mistakes that you did
I will not let myself cause my heart so much misery..
I will not break the way you did you fell so hard
I've learned the hard way to never let it get that far

Because of you I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt
Because of you I find it hard to trust not only me but everyone around me
Because of you I am afraid....

I lose my way and it's not too long because you point it out
I cannot cry because I know that's weakness in your eyes
I forced to fake a smile, a laugh everyday of my life.
My heart can't possibly break when it wasn't even whole to start with

Because of you I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt
Because of you I find it hard to trust not only me but everyone around me
Because of you I am afraid...

I watched you die
I heard you cry every night in your sleep
I was so young You should have known better than to lean on me
You never thought of anyone else
You just saw your pain
And now I cry in the middle of the night for the same damn thing

Because of you I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt
Because of you I try my hardest just to forget everything
Because of you I don't know how to let anyone else in
Because of you I'm ashamed of my life because it's empty
Because of you I am afraid....

Because of you

Because of you

Student #1

Last day teaching on weekday! Antara sedih dan senang. Hahaha..
Untuk mengenang masa-masa ini maka gua ingin menulis tentang karakter murid-murid gua.
Tentu saja namanya dirahasiakan. Hehe..

Murid yang pertama akan gua ceritakan adalah seorang laki-laki kelas 6 SD.
Inisialnya G.
Dia baru dua bulan jadi murid gua. Dulunya dia murid rekan gua tapi mungkin karena kurang cocok jadi mereka berpisah.. *lho. hehehe..
Rekan gua sudah mewanti-wanti gua ketika tau muridnya pindah ke gua.
Dan memang sih pas ngajar G ampun deh, geleng-geleng gua.
Gak mau dibilangin anaknya. Orangnya suka-suka. Misalnya gua minta dia main lagu nomor 1, kalau dia mau ya dia main. Kalau dia gak mau, dia bakal bolak balik buku terus main lagu lain -_-"
Kalau udah gitu kan gua nya yang mesti tegas. Pertamanya gua masih nurutin dia. Masih pelajari karakternya gemana. Tapi kok dia belum berubah-berubah gua baik-baikin juga. Akhirnya gua berbicara dengan lantang,
Gua : "Siapa gurunya?"
G    : "Kakak"
Gua : "Sekarang main yang ini!"
G    : *nurut
Gua : (dalam hati "HAHAHA")
Tapi pernah juga dia marah sama gua. Canggih ya anak sekarang, bisa loh ngebentak gurunya..
Gara-garanya dia masih berusaha main lagu terus gua koreksi karena dia mainnya salah.
Dari situ gua bisa liat kalau dia tipe nya anak yang mau ngelakuin semuanya dulu baru habis itu diajarin. Jadi gak bisa tuh gua koreksiin pas dia lagi main lagu.
G suka banget ngobrak ngabrik barang-barang bawaan gua. Metronome gua sering banget dimain-mainin. Kalau liat gua bawa laptop dia langsung buka laptopnya terus bilang "mau main game". Nah, ini kesempatan buat gua untuk membuat dia latihan. Kalau dia mau latihan dan nurut sama gua, 10 menit terakhir dia boleh main game online. Fantastis nya dia bisa loh lancar main lagu nya.
Makanya dia itu cerdas kalau gua liat. Untuk G, gua berharap supaya dia bisa serius main piano nya. Kalau neken tuts piano jarinya harus sesuai sama yang di partitur, jangan ngasal aja.
Semangat G!

Dua hari untuk selamanya :)

Apa yang dapat kamu lakukan dalam waktu dua hari dengan orang-orang yang kamu sayangi?
Apa yang ingin kamu wujudkan ketika kamu memiliki sisa waktu 48 jam dengan mereka?

Kami dapat berenang bersama. Menikmati setiap percikan air yang menyentuh kulit.
Kami dapat berjemur di bawah terik matahari dan merasakan kehangatannya.
Kemudian terkejut karena perubahan warna kulit kami.
Setelah itu aku menyadari bahwa kehangatan memang membawa perubahan :)
Kami dapat bernyanyi bersama. Membuat melodi-melodi indah seperti kenangan kami.
Kami dapat tertawa bersama bahkan pada hal-hal yang sebenarnya tidak lucu.
Kami menikmati malam bersama
dan dengan lugu memesan makanan dengan rasa pedas yang tidak tertahankan.
Kami tidur bersama-sama dan terkejut saat terbangun karena melihat wajah yang lain tepat di depan wajah kami.

Saat kami kehilangan arah untuk menentukan tujuan, kami selalu kembali ke awal dimana semua dimulai.

Ketika detik-detik terakhir akan terlewati, yakinlah itu bukan yang terakhir.

Doa akan tetap mempersatukan ketika bahkan ketika jarak memisahkan kita.
Doa adalah cara kita memeluk dari jauh...

I'm gonna miss our togetherness, guys..
(I already miss it)

:")

Bernyanyi~

Udah sekitar dua bulan aku berlatih vokal. Bernyanyi ternyata bukan hal yang mudah untukku. Sepertinya  butuh les untuk menjadi lebih percaya diri dulu baru les vokal.

Tapi senengnya, aku punya temen yang bisa jadi coach buat nyanyi. Sabar banget deh.. Coba tebak siapaaaaa....~

Dan senangnya lagiiiiiiiiiii.... aku menemukan link yang bagus buat pemanasan sebelum nyanyi.. 

1. http://soundcloud.com/vokalplus/pemanasan-latihan-01-humming

2. yang susah yang ini nihhh... belum bisa-bisa...

http://soundcloud.com/vokalplus/pemanasan-latihan-02-lip-trill

3. kalau yang ini pas banget untukku biar artikulasinya jelas

http://soundcloud.com/vokalplus/pemanasan-latihan-03

4. link yang ini juga mantap...

http://soundcloud.com/vokalplus/pemanasan-latihan-04-pelemasan

Terima kasih Mas Indra Aziz yang udah berbagi. Semoga cita-cita untuk masuk di choir nya Mas Indra Aziz bisa kesampean di tahun depan.. Habisin tahun ini untuk latihan dulu deh..

Enjoying life

I've just finished my recital. It was awesome. Haha.. proud of it. Proud of myself no matter what others say… Proud of the efforts I did. Sometimes people doesn't see the efforts and they don't want to know the pain behind something you have got finally.

Thanks for Karince and Bombie because they are attended my performance. We took a walk to Botani Square. We had fun. Then Bombie went home. I and Karince back to the mall and … an idea crossed to our mind. We attended to stranger’s wedding party. Hahaha.. -.-“

I hope it was the only craziest thing I did.. xP

Hmm.. The feeling of sad and happy seem so close... Sometimes I can feel both feelings at the same time. For example, when I graduated of course I’m happy but in the other side I do sad because I will meet my close friend rarely since our domicile is so far each other.

One thing that I should learn is to enjoy every moment fighting fear with confidence.

Stand with my own feet.. What would life be if I had no courage to attempt anything?

I want to develop all my skills in every ability that God has given to me.

And enjoy the journey...

Good bye to childhood and teens life. I have been growing up..

Welcome my early adulthood life. 

Enjoying the present. Enjoying being mature..

Enjoying to be my self..

Which way to go....

Sitting in a seat I'm waiting on one of my students come.
Listening other students practicing piano, keyboard, and violin.
I realize I'm falling in love for the first time... with music...

After passed my theses defense I decided to focus on learning (and enjoying) music.
For me it is so hard of enjoying something. Some people tell me that I am so serious in this life.
Now here I am... Enjoy, relax, see the world in a different perspective.

I have taken a vocal class. I was late and my teacher kind a young handsome guy :3
I felt so nervous. He told me that I should come on time next class but.... I was late again. five minutes late. I thought it made him bad mood so he looked stern at me. I hope that was just my feeling not in reality. He said I have a problem with give out my voice to the air. He is right. It is difficult to talk about what's on my mind or what's happening. I guess I'm not good at verbal ability and have limitation vocabulary.

I also have taken a violin class. My teacher... I guess he need to learn how to be more patient. I can teach him if he let me but give me a free of charge. HAHA... I had no idea why I CAN'T follow the beat exactly. I need to practice more and more.

What makes I'm afraid is deciding a wrong option. Yesterday I talked to my boss and he told that life is choice. He described what I can get if I still working in his office. He told me he would promote me to be a manager in his music school and my salary will be two digits in my early adulthood. And also I have more time to learn violin and improve my skill on piano. I can imagine how happy my life if I can life like that.
But I know. Life is not that simple. I've learnt about four years in university with my parents' money. How could I do nothing with it... I want to work in formal office with some colleague, have lunch in a restaurant, talk about business, chit chat about each life, make a lot of friendships...    
     
I have to choose... Deep in my heart, I want to stay in music but I can't. In October (after graduation) I will start looking for a job.. Wish me luck..

It should be...

Today should be easy and beautiful..
Today I had my very first time piano classic concert, playing Mazurka in B flat by Chopin.
Very happy because my friend, her brother, and cousin wanted to come to see my playing.
I woke up and prepared dress, make up, everything perfectly.
Attended devotion first at 9 a.m then had breakfast.
My friend said she can't come because a reason.
Took public transportation to the location. I arrived at about 12 p.m
I had been scheduled at 1 p.m but MC called me to the stage after 15 minutes.
And I was not ready enough.. but what can I do? I walked to the white grand piano.
Nervous. Played.. Finished..Heard some applause.. and walked back to my teacher..
Then I met my Sunday school student came to perform too.
Meet a violin and vocal instructor in a music school I teach.
Meet my sister and her boyfriend also.
After the concert, I joined some guys to Jakarta.
But I don't know, I feel alone.
They like strangers. or I am the stranger? Completely feels like a stranger.
Today is very different with what I imagine..
My decision ruins my imagination.
Please self, relax, and laugh a lot..
The world need it...

i put my practice here.. sorry for a little mistake in a middle of the song.. promise, next time will be better.. xP

Four Inspiring Men

A bit funny when I think about this post. It wasn't too hard to think about inspiring men for me. I used to make this post titled "five inspiring men". But I just could find four.. -_-"

haha.. let's see who they are...

Tadaaaaammm.. 

4th:

Lee Min Ho

I don't really excited about korea but since I've seen 'city hunter',

I captivated with an actor named Lee Min Ho.

He is so cute, cool, and handsome..!! xP

but I don't like his performance in Boys Before Flower. so feminine.. :(

He teaches me to look after my appearance because when people see you, the first thing they recognize is your appearance.

3rd:

Michael Bublé

He is so handsome, talented, has a great voice, cute, cool, modest.

His age is more than 35 but He still look young.

I love his song titled 'home', 'haven't met you yet', 'my everything'.

He inspires me to  learn more about music.

I hope someday I can meet him.

I want to be his piano player.

That's my dream.

:)

2nd: 

Barrack Obama

The First Man of United States.

The first African-American President of States.

He is so brave, strong, family loving, modest.

I proud for he had lived in Indonesia, my country.

Obama, please take me your country.

Please, please, please, please.....

And in the first position is belong to:

Ricardo Izecson dos Santos Leite

(Kaká)

So proud of him.

Handsome, faithful, family loving, modest, religious, healthy, elegant, and  

He is belong to Jesus.

All criterias that I like is on him. ;p

 

love is ... (5/5)

If you realize I jump to write post "love is ... (5/5)" It because I still prepare something for my post "love is ... (4/5)"  It is still secret... :P

Now, I want to write about lifemate here. And I used to think to write about exes. but when I think twice it's better if I write about future boyfriend who will be my husband rather than memories in the past, right..?? :D

Actually I haven't been close enough with any boy around. Sometime I think is there anyone who really fears the Lord, someone who really respects me as a woman, someone who's gonna responsible with his family, someone who's faithful, someone who can build a family based on God's words  ??

Being around with many boys who act like jerk I have thought that there's no any good man anymore >_<"

but I still have faith there's someone I've waited to find me who fulfill the criterias above (amen).

Yiruma-Love Me

heaven knows

This song is about representative my feeling now.

As my promise, I will never write any "galau" post, I guess it's ok to change it into a song xP

Oya, I have to change "she's" into "he's" on the lyrics since I'm a lady :P.

This song sing by  Rick Price.

And the video I take from youtube, I don't know who's playing but I guess He's from Philippines.

Enjoy it.

He's always on my mind from the time I wake up 'till I close my eyes

He's everywhere I go, He's all I know

And though he's far away, it just keeps getting stronger everyday.

And even now he's gone I'm still holding on

So tell me where do I start cause it's breaking my heart. Don't wanna let him go...~

Maybe my love will come back someday, only heaven knows...

And maybe our hearts will find a way, only heaven knows.

And all I can do is hope and pray... 'cause heaven knows...

My friends keep tellin' me, that if you really love him, you've gotta set him free

And if he returns in time I know he's mine

So tell me where do I start cause it's breaking my heart. Don't wanna let him go...~

Maybe my love will come back someday, only heaven knows...

And maybe our hearts will find a way, only heaven knows.

And all I can do is hope and pray... 'cause heaven knows...

Why I live in despair..? 'Cause wide awake or dreaming, I know he's never there

And all this time I act so brave I'm shaking inside.

Why does it hurt me so . . .  ?

Maybe my love will come back someday, only heaven knows...

And maybe our hearts will find a way, only heaven knows.

And all I can do is hope and pray... 'cause heaven knows...

Maybe my love will come back someday, only heaven knows...

And maybe our hearts will find a way, only heaven knows.

And all I can do is hope and pray... 'cause heaven knows...

heaven knows...

heaven knows..

Slalu bersamaku - Giving My Best

Selalu bersamaku

(always with me)

Hanya Kau tempatku berlindungku

(You alone are my refuge)

Hanya Engkau laguku dan kekuatanku

(You alone are my song and my strength)

Izinkanlah ku datang menyembah, membawa syukurku

(Let me come to worship, bring my gratitude)

Sedalamnya hatiku Kau pun tahu

(You know about what the deepest in my heart)

dan kasih Mu tak jauh dalam jiwaku

(and Your love is not far from my soul)

Di dalam kesesakkan, di dalam kemenangan

(In tightness, in victory)

Ku tahu Engkau selalu bersamaku

(I know You are always with me)